Bourdoins? Ardoque?

There has been lots going on in our brains the last couple of months, from unpacking (slowly, but surely) to getting engaged, to starting the long journey of my job hunt, to trying to knock the CPA exam out of the park. We have been busy, y'all.

Because of that, we decided to push off talking about all things wedding-related to January. I'll be done with school and (hopefully!) gainfully employed, so we can figure out a better budget that falls between "OMG we won't be able to afford to feed people!" to "OMG I absolutely need a string quartet AND a rocking DJ!"

(These are notes from my head. It's a scary place.)

While we are putting off wedding talks, we are definitely not dodging marriage talks. As it turns out, weddings last for an afternoon, while marriages last for the rest of your lives. And that is a crazy scary commitment. So in our down time (HA!), we've been tentatively talking about our life post-wedding, when it comes time for things like babies and if we want them, or where we would like to live in the next few years (before said babies).

*Side note: These are discussions we have had many times over, but with an actual engagement and marriage in the works, these discussions take on a whole new realness. It's crazy. And wonderful. But pretty crazy.

I recently read an article about women changing their names, and the trend of women who are electing to keep their name, hyphenate, or create a new family surname with their spouse.

When confronting all of the wedding-related things thrown at me, I'm trying to ask "why" to traditions. (Current battle: Garter toss? Whyyy?) The idea of changing my name is one I already assumed I would do, because what else do women do when they get married? This article shook me and made me think about WHY I would change my name.

Of course, my family means the world to me, which is an important reason why I'm not particularly keen on changing my name in the first place. Plus, the tradition is deeply rooted in the whole idea of "women-as-property" gig that is so very unappealing. Jeromy considered taking my name instead of me taking his, but he has done intense research into his surname and his history, and he has come to love his name and all it stands for. So, we are at an impasse.

We believe it's important to have a name for our little baby family as a unit. However, what we are left with is to create a new name for our family.

When I mentioned the idea of us creating a new name, Jeromy automatically said, "WE CAN DO THAT?!" Followed by "I COULD BE A LANNISTER! NO, A STARK!"

I'm thinking this will have to be something we will have to continue discussing..

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EDIT: APW has written a lot on the subject of name changing (Bless them!), so for more reading, check out this and this and this. And definitely this.